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The photo-coffeeier is broken
"I come in on a Monday morning, and notice I have a message," pilot fish recalls. "I punch the voicemail button and listen on speaker. The user is on their speaker phone explaining to me that the copy machine is broken, they are only getting half. Well, the copier has an automatic document feeder, so I thought maybe someone left something on the glass. I continue listening to the user explaining how they tried shutting it off, turning it back on, tried all the buttons, but still was only getting half. This went on for a couple minutes, then the user says 'I just want to be able to put my money in and get what I expect'"...
The bit about "putting money in" has fish stumped, because photocopying is, like at most workplaces, free for employees. So he listens to the message again, and again, and realises the user was saying "coffee", not "copy".
"I called the user back and suggested calling the number on the side of the coffee machine for service", fish recalls with a chuckle.
Following procedure
IT contractor pilot fish is working at a company where change management is taken very seriously.
"Proposed changes are to be submitted to a Notes application by 4pm on Tuesday and are discussed at a change meeting on Wednesday mornings at which all IT departments were represented," fish says. "Once a change had been completed, everyone was expected to update an asset inventory database to track any results from the change implementation.
Burt, a serious man who is in charge of change management, is insistent that this procedure is followed whenever there are changes.
Shortly after becoming aware of Burt's fastidiousness, fish takes a bad fall while speed skating and ends up with a broken neck.
She is able to return to work, but she has to wear a halo brace screwed into her skull for three months while her neck heals. At the end of that time, she graduates to a hard collar brace.
That's on a Tuesday. The next day, fish arrives at work wearing her new collar brace.
And since it's Wednesday morning, fish dutifully heads to the change management meeting. Burt walks in, surveys the group, and announces, "There has been an egregious violation of the change management policies."
The attendees look warily around the room, trying to figure out who's about to be reprimanded. Burt continues: "Betty had her halo brace removed outside the Thursday night maintenance window. Plus, the change was never submitted for change management discussion."
It turns out Burt has a sense of humour after all.
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