Fry Up: Cool guys

This popular video, originally produced for the 2009 MTV awards, entitled “cool guys don’t look at explosions” features a string of clips of the many incidents in action movies where an actor turns his (or occasionally her) back on a scene of flaming havoc and strolls nonchalantly towards the camera.

Fry Up was reminded of this on seeing the opening slide of a presentation for Jade’s new Joob Mobile framework. This could be called “cool guys don’t look at graffiti”; it shows a businesslike (but casually dressed) man grasping his iPhone and walking away from a wall covered with brightly painted tags, but pointedly defocused as though indicating that it belongs to the past or to a minority-confused lifestyle, from which our executive (but casual) guy disclaims any association.

Other images we feel a lot of thought must have gone into in the Joob Mobile slide show include a brain in luminous electric blue to illustrate “computational intelligence”, and for “cloud computing” a rank of shiny computer cabinets curved into cloud-like unreality by use of a fisheye lens.

And what’s the Joob Mobile framework all about? Why, “enterprise integration” that “avoids lifecycle conflict” and, of course, “delivers a human-centred mobile experience”. That is what you would expect, really; when they start designing mobile devices for animals, we’ll know the downward slide of civilisation has begun.

Jade takes Joob into mobile space

Cool guys do work for Telecom Wholesale

Of course they do! It is just that with the head of Telecom Wholesale being removed from the Telecom executive board – although we hasten to add still reporting to the CEO – we couldn’t help but feel for the team being evicted from the top table.

Telecom makes final offer to CFH after UFB negotiations
Telecom announces slimmed down executive team

Cool guys move to the country

Well, maybe. The signing of the Rural Broadband Initiative between the Government and Telecom and Vodafone, will give 86 percent of rural houses and businesses access to broadband services at peak speeds of at least 5Mbps when the $285 million project is complete in six years.

The key word is “peak”, clearly 5Mbps won’t be in the offing every hour, of every day. In order to “reach peak”, country dwellers might need to set the alarm for 3am and log onto the internet when their remote neighbours are tucked up in their beds counting cows and not hogging the fixed wireless service beaming out of those 35-metre high cell towers.

Still, the Federated Farmers is giving the RBI qualified support. “On the face of it, the announcement is a positive step forward, but we’ve yet to get the full picture on what the contracts mean in practice,” says president Don Nicolson in a statement.

“For example, what will be done for those who seem to have missed out on today’s announcement. We also need to learn a lot more about peak download and upload speeds, coverage and of course, pricing.”

Might pay to keep hold of the alarm clock a little longer.

RBI contract signed with Telecom and Vodafone
Rural broadband takes a step forward for 1.1 million kiwis

Cool guys go out for breakfast

Fry Up Live Christchurch debate, free breakfast, all welcome

Cute guys get Easter eggs

Meerkats at London Zoo get a visit from the Easter Bunny.

Happy Easter from Fry Up.